And so it begins...

17 hours and counting. I've been waiting a long time, but thanks to the generosity of my mom and dad, I'll be able to finally have my ACL reconstruction surgery Friday morning. I originally injured by knee in mid-January.

During rehearsals for Noises Off, a fast-paced comedy in 3 acts, I fell to the ground while rehearsing a rather physical scene. I heard a "pop" in my right knee and that was it. I was forced to pull out of the show and the director, Jeremy Kendall, took over the role I vacated. Jeremy didn't miss a beat and was very funny, as was the rest of the cast, and the show was very successful.

Even though I heard that "pop," I was still surprised when my MRI scan showed a torn ACL. Unfortunately, an MRI cannot be repaired. It can only be reconstructed from a graph of tendons. These graphs are usually taken from the patella or the hamstring. In rare cases, a graph is used from a cadaver.

My graph will be from my hamstring. This will only cause a 10% loss in strength in that tendon which is negligible for most people. This graph will then be attached to screws. You can find a better explanation of the surgery for those who aren't too squeamish here.

After surgery, I will be required to spend the night in the hospital. I can't wait to get me some of that yummy hospital food! I can go home Saturday morning.

Rehabilitation will start almost immediately. After I'm knocked out for surgery, I will begin exercising in my sleep. I often move my hands and feet while I'm sleeping just like a dog does. This will make it rather challenging for the surgeon, but I feel this is necessary to get myself into the right frame of mind after I wake up. After my 9th knee jerk, I suspect the surgeon will just leave the instruments in my knee and run away screaming. This will make it difficult for me to go through security at the airport.

To get a better idea of the surgery, I decided last week to operate on my cat's knee. But first, I had to give my cat a good cleaning in the bathtub. After I was released from the emergency room, I decided that perhaps operating on my cat wasn't such a good idea.

I'm a little nervous about the surgery, but it won't matter. I'll be drunk. The doctor said no food or water 12 hours before the procedure, but I don't consider whisky part of that. Plus it's only fair. I suspect my surgeon will be drunk too. I did mention that I'm having my surgery at Wal-Mart, didn't I? Right next to the garden supplies across from the photo lab.

Well, wish me luck. I'll be loggin on to let you know how everything went after I sober up.

Paul